Looking Back Happily

I have dreams, but I have memories and fears too. 

Driving through the Adirondack Park on an audit route this weekend, I found myself passing through Old Forge. Old Forge, the place of many summer family getaways, canoeing on the rivers and lodging in mini log cabins and bed and breakfasts. 

They all started the same. Mom and Dad would pack frantically, at the last minute as was with everything, while my little brother Kamryn and I would gather our books and DVDs. Mom and Dad would load up her green Mercedes SUV, while Kamryn and I would bicker about which side of the car (Mom's or Dad's) each would sit on. A strange premonition of the split my family would suffer only a few short years later. Finally ready, we launched. Soon we would arrive, greeted by log cabins in miniature. 

Those were happy days. Those were filled with wonder, as sparks floated out of camp fires like red hot fireflies. Those days were filled with stories, memories, learning, experiencing. Many times we would emerge from our cabin to find deer grazing around the clearing. Approaching slowly we were able to feed and pet the desensitized creatures while mom looked on, camera in hand. 

Dad had never been an adventurous person, so naturally Mom would take us in the canoes. I remember paddling with her as Kamryn lazed around as if we were servants, as she told us stories about how wild rice was harvested from rivers just like this one fourteen hundred miles away in her native land of Minnesota. 

I've wanted to go back, relive some memories, see some spots, but I hadn't gotten the chance. Unfortunately for me, I was working past dark so seeing places wasn't a possibility this weekend. But on my way there I was struck by how beautiful it is in that area. I pulled over by a small lake to take in the sunset and I realized how blessed I am to live in this beautiful State in which world renown cities cohabitate with hidden beauty such as this. 

I've been thinking a lot lately, initiated by the changes about to happen. Thoughts and memories, both hopeful and morose, have plagued my conscious. Memories of my mother and the relationship I wish I could have with her, worries about my father and his prospect once I move out, regrets based on my lack of presence in Kamryn's life... I know that it's not that I don't care, but that I am not about to let things that I cannot control ruin my future. I'm moving to a bright new promising city, into an apartment of my own. This alone is enough to make me cry with joy. As I went shopping for decor and household items I found my eyes welling up in TJMaxx, realizing that this was the first time that I was making these decisions and choices and advancements on my own. I realized that I was free. I'm an adult. This is my life and I'm building it. I've finally broken from the prison I lived in for so long, living under other people's expectations and realizing that the only ones that mattered were my own and God's. 

This is my life. Not Mom's, not yours, not anyone else's. And I like it like that. 

Plunge

A lot has been going on in my life lately, and I apologize for not writing for you. I hope you'll understand.

Ever since I came back from the convent, I had dreams of moving down to Albany, starting over, and making a life for myself. Dreams faded once I got my job in Warren County, doing medical billing and A/R. I settled. I settled because I had to. I had nothing to my name but a car and my laptop. I needed a job, and that one seemed like it would do. I took it. I learned it. I mastered it. I loved it. In only five months I had even broke out of the confines of my job description, becoming the sole translator for our many Spanish-speaking patients. I became a sort of a go-to person on my team, answering questions and assisting my coworkers. Far from the top, I at least had a view from somewhere except the bottom. I was making my way.

But it wasn't my dream.

My dream isn't to live in this area. My dream isn't to live with my dad in an apartment in Glens Falls. My dream isn't to stay here. I need to spread some wings. These wings have been folded for so long. Can they still fly?

Climbing the ladder, her breathing quickened...

Stretching out, ever so slowly, I began to look. Just look. 

I crept to the edge of the diving board, peeking over...

An opportunity. I have learned that passing up an opportunity is never a good idea. Take every chance you get. If you don't you'll never advance. So I took this opportunity. An opportunity to live closer to Albany, my destination. I looked at an apartment, talked specs, and signed the lease in one day. I knew if I passed it up, I wouldn't get it back.

Bending knees, she prepared to leap...

OK. I have a place to live near there. Now to find a place to work, to thrive, to climb, to succeed.

I applied. Again and again. Silence for a few days, then calls came in. Three interviews later and I have an offer for employment, a job that will allow me to assist patients and use my knowledge and love of Spanish.

A moment of hesitation, the board quivers...

I got a phone call today, from a lady I met at the Spanish Mass in Albany. You see, I've been trying to expand my horizons. I want to meet new people, make friends, and thrive. You see, that's part of my dream too. So she called me, and we spoke (in Spanish, por supuesto) for a while. She invited me to a women's group that meets after Mass on some Sundays. A great opportunity to meet new people, grow in a community, and learn some Spanish while doing it. I agreed.

Toes curl around the edge of the board...

When I told a wise coworker of mine that I had put in my 2-week notice and was leaving for Albany, she hugged me and shared with me her advice. All of her advice was amazing. One thing really stuck with me. Always say yes. Say yes to everything. A similarly wise person (although in perhaps a different way) once said, "opportunities come once in a lifetime, yo." I refuse to watch them float by. I will jump at a chance to make my dream happen. I will leap towards any step that is even an inch higher. I refuse to be left behind. I started from zero in December and I refuse to be a sob story in the end.

JUMP!

I recently remembered a song that I fell in love with a few years back that holds some special memories for me. One particular memory above others. Driving from Huletts Landing back south, over mountains and over Lake Champlain... The view was majestic, the scenery smelled of heaven. I'll be honest. Listening to this song, the lyrics can't be made out. Here's a tip. Don't look them up. Just think of this. Driving over these mountains, seeing the lake and view expand as you crest the hills... You don't know where the road is taking you. You're progressing, trusting, taking your opportunities as they twist and turn. Keep moving. Keep climbing, sink down a little, climb some more. Twisting, winding, where?

This song makes me cry.

I don't know where I'm going. I'm just heading there. Sounds stupid. But it's beautiful.

A hilarious short story...

On I87 heading back from an audit in Port Henry tonight, I was going just a bit faster than a beat-up convertible just ahead of me. Inside the convertible were two young men, about my age. I went to pass them (on the left, of course), and just as I tied with them, they floored it and sped up a couple hundred feet, then went back down to the speed they had before. This happened a couple times, and I could tell they were just having some fun with me. So I decided to have some fun too (safely!).

They got off the Interstate at the North end of the Lake George Village, and I followed them. We ended up on Route 9 South, alone, side by side at a red light. We both accelerated when it turned green, and as we arrived at a decent speed, I slammed on my brakes so they shot up ahead of me. We both exchanged a thumbs-up and a laugh and continued driving down Rte 9 (like normal people this time).

At another red light, I was behind them, and a cop was behind me. After the light turned green, I moved over because it seemed the cop wanted to get past me to go somewhere else... And as soon as I moved over, he sped up and flicked on his lights to pull the guys in the convertible over! HAHA!! One last wave to them as they pulled to the side of the road and I was off.

Have a good night, guys. Thanks for the fun!! ;)

beep beep

Oves et Hædis...

It's a sad day.

It's a sad day when a "debate" breaks out among "Catholics" in the comments under their Bishop's statement on Facebook about the SCOTUS decision.

The following is a statement of Albany Bishop Edward B. Scharfenberger regarding today's U.S. Supreme Court decision on...
Posted by Diocese of Albany on Friday, June 26, 2015

It's a sad day when people use the word "love," and the image of God's promise, as weapons against Him. It's even sadder when these people are people that consider themselves to be Catholics.

Jesus did not change His stance on certain subjects, even when people left Him when He preached them, the Real Presence being the one that comes to my mind first (see John 6:54-69). Jesus saw that people left His side because the teaching was "hard." Jesus wasn't about to compromise the Truth for popularity. He wasn't about to run after those that left in order to apologize for having offended them, and retract his previous statement. The Gospel from this past Sunday (EF) was about the rejoicing in Heaven over the 1 repentant sinner. Why didn't Jesus chase after those people that left him? He knew that they wouldn't accept Him and His teaching. He pursues us, always with a loving heart, but He is God, and God does not change. We are the ones that need a change, a change of heart, a change toward God.

My disappointment today does not originate from the decision arrived by the Supreme Court. I honestly wasn't surprised by their choice to make gay "marriage" legal in all 50 States today. This doesn't worry me. I knew it was coming all along. Remember, we are not of this world. However, my worry and disappointment stem from the reactions of those around me. Again, I knew, for the most part, who would rejoice and who would recoil at the announcement. But what saddened my heart was seeing so many Catholics and other Christians rejoicing over this decision.

We all know that Satan has been triumphed over. We know that in the end, God will win the battle. He's God after all. But that doesn't mean that Satan won't try to win.

His largest victories are those of Catholics. He already has claimed souls of non-Catholics. They're already on his side, ultimately. But it is the soul of a devout Catholic that he wishes to conquer the most. Not only to spite God, but to bring other souls with it. This is why great Saints such as Padre Pio were troubled by demons relentlessly. Sadly, Satan has made some victories in this. Priests, Religious, and laity alike are being misinformed by each other, and are falling for the idea that homosexuals can get "married," that it's a "right," and what's worse, that Jesus Himself would support this because it seems to be the "loving and charitable" thing to do.

The saddest part by far of this is the amount of Catholics, no, wait, "catholics," that agree with SCOTUS' decision, that gay "marriage" should be available. 

Pruning time is drawing neigh. God will separate the sheep from the goats. The Church and its true adherents are dwindling, but that is how God knew it would pan out in the end. May God give us the strength to persevere in the Truth, and to spread God's Truth to those around us.

Satan's win wasn't in that the Supreme Court made this legal. His win was far before that. His win was in convincing us that God was wrong. That's how this all started, and it's been like it ever since.... 

"In the end, my Immaculate Heart will triumph..." - Our Lady of Fatima

iPhone 6 Plus!

[mini-review]

Since spring of 2013, I had an iPhone 4S. I really loved iOS and I really loved how it worked. As with everyone, the updates shook me, but were ultimately easy to get used to. When I came back from the Convent, I got the same phone back (Dad hadn't sold it or given it away yet). It was sturdy and did what I needed it to. It was trusty through audits and using it as a GPS.

But in May (May 3rd to be exact!), I took the plunge. I got an iPhone 6 Plus!! I LOVE it!

Quite the transition...

This decision wasn't made in a day. I thought about it for at least a month, watching YouTube videos and reading blog reviews comparing the 6 and it's larger counterpart the 6 Plus, trying to decide which would be a better fit for me. I visited the wireless store multiple times, trying to see if a Plus would fit in my back pocket, how big it felt in my hands, and if I thought I would enjoy using it. In the end, I decided that if I settled for the 6, I would regret my choice and wish that I had gotten the Plus.

I couldn't be happier with my decision!

My favorite features are the LTE capabilities, the camera, and TouchID, among others.

But the SIZE!

My biggest worry about getting the 6 Plus was the size. Would it fit in my back pocket? How would it feel in my hands? Would it be hard to access the entirety of the screen? I must say that although it felt huge at first, it feels just right now, and I'm so glad I got the bigger of the two 6s. (Yes, the phone fits in my back pocket!) I have hands of average size, and I find that the phone feels large sometimes, but not bulky by any means.

My favorite thing about it though is it's size. It's perfect. It's so thin, and the screen is such a great size. I do find myself being lazy lately and not wanting to reach my hand to access the top of the screen, so Reachability has been a favorite feature of mine lately.  Reachability lowers the display halfway down the screen temporarily for easy access when you double-touch the home button. I find this capability to be useful, but strangely implemented. It works great and is a fantastic feature, but at the same time it looks strange on screen. I can't think of a way to implement it in a way that doesn't look strange, but perhaps it just will take some time to get used to. Can't have everything...

Screenshot of reachability 

on my calendar 

I love TouchID! It's super easy to open my phone, and I can create prints for people who I want to have this access to my phone! Also, it can be used in other apps to protect privacy, as well as to authorize purchases and updates. I really love this feature!   I will say, though, that sometimes it malfunctions and doesn't read my print, like if my hands are wet or sweaty, or if my phone hasn't been rebooted in a long time. Even in those circumstances, I am able to type in my numerical password and gain access to my phone and its functions.

It's pretty funny now. When I had the 4S, the 5 felt large in my hands. But now that I'm accustomed to the 6Plus, everything feels small!! My 4S feels so rinky-dink that I wonder how I lived with it for so long! The whole phone fits in the borders of the 6Plus' screen!! 

Overall, I just wanted to encourage anyone who is debating getting the 6Plus. I love it, and I wouldn't trade it for a 6 for anything!!

Not a Happy Driver...

When I was 16, I scoured the newspaper ads every Sunday for a car. I would call on cars to find them to be too expensive or in too much need of repair. It was frustrating, as I wanted a car really badly. One Sunday in particular, I saw a listing that caught my eye. A 2005 Chevrolet Cobalt, with only 33,000 miles on it. Asking price was only $6,500. Excitedly, I called the owner and asked about it. It was in perfect condition! I begged my parents to look at it and think about buying it. Dad agreed to go look at it, and came back home with sad news. Someone had already bought it. I was devastated. 

We decided to go get ice cream that evening, and on the way we took a detour. Dad said he had to go measure a house for windows (See his shop here!). We pulled into a driveway, and Mom and Dad got out of the car, and walked up to a silver Chevrolet. They smiled and looked at me. They had bought it! Dad later told me the hilarious story of his first visit to the car that would later become the Kylie-mobile. He and another potential buyer were looking at it at the same time. The other guy made an offer, but Dad said, "If you buy this car, you're going to make a 16 year old really sad today."  Dad guilt-tripped him into passing on the vehicle. That sly dog...

My car has been the setting

 for many a non-moving selfie.

Ever since I got that car, I've been going to the same place for all my repairs and oil changes. Dad and I were loyal to this company because Dad trusted them. Recently, that trust has been broken. 

This year, I began to have trouble with my car. It would make terrible screeching noises as I slowed down, especially from high speeds like coming off the Interstate. It sounded like metal on metal.

I brought it in to the shop, asking them to look at my brakes. That's what anybody would think is wrong with it. I picked it up later. "Nope. It's your swing arms. You need new ones." And how much would that cost me? $800. Fine. Replaced and paid for. Driving it the next day, the sound was worse! 

I brought it in to get an oil change, and when I left the shop the sticker in the upper left corner of my windshield was the same one as before, and my digital oil monitor hadn't been changed and still said something like 40%. I called the shop. "Did you change my oil?" "Uhhh, we don't know. Bring it in and we'll do it again." I mean, how do you not know if you changed my oil? It was in the shop all day long! They changed my oil again (and I made sure they only charged me once) and I was on my way.

My bumper after I got rear-ended

 at school my junior year.

I brought my car back in because of the screeching noise (that had gotten progressively worse) about a month ago. Again, it wasn't my brakes they said, but my shocks and struts that needed to be replaced. Fine. Another $800 put into my car. I asked them as I left: "Are you sure that my brakes are okay?" The mechanic said to me, "Oh yeah, your pads are fine - you've got a long way to go on them." I believed him. But when I left the shop, it still screeched.

The next week I had an appointment at a tire shop to get my snow tires taken off. When I went in, I gave the attendant my keys and asked, "is there any way you can look at my brakes while you're working on my car? It's making a terrible noise." They said "of course" and went to get started on my car. As I waited for the service to be done, the attendant came out. "You really need new brakes." My jaw dropped to the floor. All four had to be replaced. I had him fix my brakes. No way was I going to go back to the other mechanic.

My brother and I hanging out in my car...

I brought my car in multiple times to my mechanic that I've had for four years, and every time it wasn't my brakes, but something else that was uncannily expensive and urgent. I spent about 2K on things that I'm not even sure I needed. And what's the most unsettling, what if my brakes failed while I was driving? What if something happened? I had felt my brakes give way before, and I could tell there wasn't much left to them when I would brake. When I got my new brakes, the difference was incredible! The mechanic explicitly denied that my brakes were bad every time I brought my car in. 

It's hard to know if they just didn't know that my brakes were terrible, or if they purposefully pretended that they weren't. I don't know which makes more sense. But in the end, they gave me false information, and my life and car were put in danger. I will not be returning to that shop, and I will caution everyone not to go there.

If anyone in the Capital Region knows of a really good (TRUSTWORTHY) mechanic, please let me know!

Coming Soon!

Clear your calendars! Grab the spouse and kids! Fr. Paul Nicholson is coming to Albany!!

Join Fr. Paul Nicholson and Catholic families from around the Diocese and beyond for the Conference on the Family! 

Fr. Paul Nicholson is a missionary priest who has traveled all over the globe to give parish missions and to minister to the Catholic people. Fr. Nicholson is an extremely engaging speaker, who relates to the people, is humorous, and delivers content that is efficacious and easy to relate to.

The Conference on the Family aims to help us better understand how to apply our Faith to our family!

Thursday, June 4th's evening session is for women; Friday, June 5th's session is for men; Saturday's family session includes the talk for families, Mass, and a cook-out! Bring the kids!!

The Conference will be taking place at St. Paul the Apostle in Schenectady, NY.

Tickets are $10/session (Saturday is free-will offering), and children under 18 get in free. Tickets or reservations can be made on our Event page. Please note: Even if you are going to pay at the door, please register so that we can know how many attendees to expect!

Listen for the ad on WOPG, and like Capital Region Catholic Conferences on Facebook!! Please share this exciting event with your friends (within and without the Diocese!), and please pray for Fr. Nicholson and the success of this event!

Holy Family, ora pro nobis!